I’ve been thinking a lot about this whole Rihanna domestic abuse thing.
It bugged me slightly that a day after she was beat up by Chris Brown, her publicist released only this statement: “Rihanna is well.”
But then again, what did I expect? “Rihanna is horrified that not only did her boyfriend beat her up, it has become global news and she is mortified that the photo of wounds sustained has been illegally released by the police department.” Obviously, none of us expected that level of truth. But something in between perhaps?
Well, anyway, I’ve been reading a few blogs-eonline/celebrity garbage type junk that are suggesting it’s time for Rihanna to speak out. They say she should not be silent about domestic abuse and that as a public figure she needs to take her responsibility to give voice to this on behalf of other woman.
But here’s the thing. This was all less than 6 months ago. Doesn’t the girl need process time? And also, just because she’s a celebrity why does she have to elaborate on something so shameful and so awful? Does she need to become the voice of battered women? On the other hand, if she never brings it up, is that slightly irresponsible? Or just being private for the sake of her sanity? Or should we give her like 2-5 years, for the sake of hindsight, at least?
And what about Micheal J. Fox? His sharing about his Parkinsons has been nothing but healing for everyone involved after years of secrecy. What about Jennifer Hudson, does she also have a responsibility to share about having your mother be murdered, etc.?
Chris Brown has come out publicly to apologize and to offer remorse over his behavior. He even went so far as to say that when he grew up watching his mother being beaten by his step-father he would be so scared he would pee his pants and he has regretfully become the abuser he once feared. I admired that in this public scenario he gave proper weight to his behavior.
So, what do you think? response or no response by Rihanna?
Hmmm, I love the way you write and help us to look at things from a different perspective. I hadn’t thought about her healing time, the shame invovled.. etc. However, I wanted her to speak out because I heard that she was recording a song with Chris Brown just a couple of weeks after the incident. I’m not sure if that information was/ is correct. If it is then I think she should speak out for sure because I for one would want to know what is going through her head. If it’s not true then I need to give her silence a bit more thought. I personally think that public figures such as Rhianna have a responsibility to the young people that worship the ground she walks on. But, I’m pretty sure I could be swayed to think differently. Did I even answer the question. Oh, I hear Sarai
the best question is, if you were beat up by Stephen & it was made public -as public as it could for being a non-celebrity- would you speak about it & how long would you wait?
If Dave beat me up & somebody posted a pic of it on facebook & people were all up in arms about what a jerk he was, would folks expect me to blog about it? How long would be an acceptable time before I said, “look this is what happened & it’s a shameful but were moving on with life.” Or for example, folks would be wondering about Ransom & his safety as well. Do I have a responsiblity to tell folks that Ransom & I are (or are not) safe? It’s a big decision, especially for someone as world famous as Rihanna. It’s complicated!!!
Hmmm . . . I think I would rather she take her time to think and process. Her youth and position give her the ability to incite and/or soothe and she will need wisdom and time to decide where to fall in that. Our culture made her popular, and while she didn’t run from the popularity, does her acceptance of it mean she owes us her soul? I’m not so sure . . . my two cents . . .
I don’t know how long she should wait, but I guess I do HOPE she takes some time to heal (emotionally as well as physically), before doing anything public on the matter. When it all first happened, I felt like crying for her, and my husband was shocked at my emotional response, but I just feel soooooo sooo bad for her. I would love it if she came out eventually and spoke on the issue, but if she doesn’t, I’m certainly not one to judge her on her decisions. I really hope she doesn’t get back together with him, for her own well being (again, emotionally as well as physically), and finds someone who will treat her the way she deserves (I love that girl), but ultimately, it’s her life and her decisions to make. The public is way too judging of celebrities. We need to focus on getting our own lives in order and not judge other so much. I certainly have compassion for her and all she’s been through, but it’s not for me to judge what she does with it all now.
this is very well written and i absolutely agree with you
thanks, Peezy.